Monday, July 20 12:00 AM ET

Transformers 3 to Feature Two-hour Explosion

By Brian Briggs

Hollywood, CA – The third installment in the highly-successful Transformer movie franchise will feature a world record breaking two-hour explosion.  The movie is tentatively titled Transformers Go Boom.

"It would be easy with today's technology to just create an endless loop of explosion that lasts two hours, but audiences can get that from an animated GIF file," said director Michael Bay. "Instead we're working with top pyrotechnic and computer graphic artists to create a unique two-hour explosion. I've got a budget of over a hundred million dollars, so you can bet it's going to be awesome."

Bay didn't want to reveal other details of the plot, but sources at the studio expects the final cut to run for less than two hours and five minutes.

Moviegoers can also expect the loudest explosion they've ever heard.  Theaters will have to upgrade their sound systems to the newly designed Bay Bone Breaker Sound System, which will envelop viewers with over 250 decibels of explosive sound.

"We fully expect some fatalities," said Bay. "It'll truly blow their minds."

Critics who savaged Bay's Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen say it's "more of the same" from Bay.  Roger Ebert of the Chicago Sun-Times said, "It doesn't sound much different than every other movie he's directed.  At least he's taken the pretense of a plot out of the movie and just giving people what they want."