This story originally posted June 11, 2009 Redmond, WA - At a press conference today Microsoft CEO Steve Ballmer said the company would to continue its aggressive rebranding of its…
Redmond, WA - Microsoft announced the much-beloved tree-punching game would finally be getting a long-awaited sequel. The game tentatively titled Minecraft 2: Project Moolah will be released in the summer…
Many Microsoft Windows users who downloaded the recently released AntiSpyware program from Microsoft, or had it installed through an automatic Windows update, woke up to a surprise. Unintentionally, the heuristics…
At a hastily convened press conference Bill Gates announced that he personally thinks that "Linux is the best OS ever." He added, "Mundie and Ballmer are idiots. Their talk about how open source…
Philadelphia, PA - In news that is sure to excite the Linux community, long time Linux developer Todd Stanton got laid. "I still have trouble believing it myself," said Todd. I was doing…
Around the World - Linus Torvalds announced yesterday that the Linux Kernel 2.4 will be delayed. He blamed the delay on interference from Microsoft's Army of Evil Monkeys. The army…
Redmond, WA - Microsoft purchased evil from Satan for $2.7 billion after many months of tough negotiations. "We've been after Satan for some time," said CEO Steve Ballmer. "Negotiations were tough,…