Hollywood, CA – A horde of undead actors who have been playing zombies in post-apocalyptic films and TV shows for years is now reportedly considering unionizing. These flesh-eating thespians have had enough of being pigeonholed as mindless, brain-munching monsters and are ready to sink their teeth into some meaty roles.
“We’re more than just rotting corpses,” said Vince McGregor, a zombie actor who has appeared in several films, including World War Z and The Walking Dead. “We have thoughts, feelings, and dreams just like everyone else. Just because we have a hunger for brains, doesn’t limit our emotional range.”
The success of HBO’s The Last of Us has once again brought the disparity between the undead and living actors to the forefront. The zombie actors are frustrated that they are always cast as the enemy, with little regard for their individual talents and abilities. They argue that they have been discriminated against in the film industry for far too long and that it’s time for a change.
“We want to be able to showcase our range as actors,” said Celia Fox, another zombie actor. “I used to do Shakespeare, but now I’m limited to doing groans for zombie video games.”
The zombie actors are also pushing for better working conditions on set. They claim they are often mistreated and not given the same rights as their human co-stars. They want better access to brains, improved makeup and prosthetics, and a union contract that recognizes their unique needs and challenges.
“Sure, occasionally one of us will lose control and attack a camera operator, or bite a production assistant,” said McGregor. “But, it’s just because we’re just so invested in our roles. Growing our numbers doesn’t hurt either. I mean the biting hurts, but only until they’re zombified.”
Despite their challenges, the zombie actors are optimistic about the future. They believe that with the right support and representation, they can finally break free from the shackles of typecasting and carve out a place for themselves in Hollywood.