Monday, August 13 12:00 AM ET

Apple Will Release Lower Cost iPlacebo

Cuptertino , CA - To reach out to the dissident crowd in the iPod revolution, Apple has launched their new line of iPlacebo products. They will allow people to look like they're using iPods, but are only using defective iPod cases and damaged white headphones.

"The point of the iPlacebo is to allow the average person who can't spend $340 on a limited edition U2 iPod to buy a similar, although not functional, product which will enable them to fit in with the rest of the crowd," stated Henry Ivanenstein, Marketing spokesperson for Apple Computer. "For less than 10% of the cost of our high-end iPods, they can walk away from our stores with an iPlacebo and feel like they have an iPod."

The iPlacebo Basic package includes a damaged, empty iPod case with a pair of defective headphones, guaranteed to look almost exactly like a fully functional iPod. The iPlacebo Deluxe package also includes a set of transparent stickers to place on the screen so it looks like it's playing something. The iPlacebo Light only includes the standard white headphones, but the jack can be tucked into a pocket to make up for the absence of the iPod case.

"It's a great way to reuse damaged products that would otherwise be sent straight to the garbage can," continued Ivanenstein. "We are helping reduce waste, helping people fit in, and helping out company to grow by selling garbage to people."

Rumors that Apple will change it's slogan to "CONFORM!" have not been confirmed.